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secret happiness

2/17/2015

When it is so secret that nobody knows it, is it really there?
But you smiled at me today. Like you really meant it. No headtilt, no hidden guilt, no obvious, "ugh, she is gonna ask something again that I don't wanna do". None of that. As if we really got along. And maybe we actually do.
The practical side of threshold thinking asks for another challenge in concentration. The letting go of theory. I have tried writing towards that through the book all along, but now I have to do it. And I ask all of you who write with me about dancing and biking and falling into holes, try to get away from the theory, try to focus on where the body leaves the mind and where the mind leaves the body. Yes, it is sort of a religious experience. This is precisely what it is.
Like making love.

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more and more snow

2/15/2015

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A good year with a lot of snow. And solitude, too.
I don't know where I stop and where you start. We are one another's threshold and each other's mirror, and then we are one again. But we are all parts, everything is just a piece. Why do I always aim at everything, although I know that the whole can never be reached, it stays in the background, for ever there but never seen completely. We all move in parts, pieces of reality, pieces of truth, one with the other, connecting thresholds. I should know that, but still, I get sad because of the absence of sensing the whole, there must be some Heidegger traces in my thought after all. He was also concerned with that.
I put this snow note in for a Sunday after Valentine's day, although it is the best day of love it is again filled with white isolation.

Friendly neighbors help with shoveling and ask where you are. You are being a friendly neighbor somewhere else.

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cars in the snow

2/11/2015

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Envelopes

2/11/2015

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Actually this was supposed to be another snow day post for February 9, a week exactly after the first snow day post there was another snow day and now the day has passed and I have forgotten most of it. My short term memory is bad. There was something involving white hot chocolate. Today the snow has lifted and there was even a little bit of sun and I could go running although the track is full of snow so I ran around it and looked at the houses. There is one with a purple lining around the door. We could paint a little this year, after the snow.
Envelopes. You said envelopes again, two years after the first time. Thank you. Never get mad about missed moments, though. Kicking snow walls is so useless. But you said envelopes. That's what counts.

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Snow day threshold

2/2/2015

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"That's the movies, Ed! Try reality!"

"No thanks."

Today is a day like any other day. Only it is a snow day. Lots and lots of snow. Yesterday the patriots won the super bowl and today is another day where we don't get along where I don't thank you for your concern and don't wait long enough before screaming or throwing things on the wall. Or maybe I will.

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secret happiness

more and more snow

cars in the snow

Envelopes

Snow day threshold

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